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Gentleman Reg, "The Boyfriend Song"
(2004)

Boyfriend, boyfriend, where are you?
I ain't got no money and I ain't got no boyfriend
Boyfriend, boyfriend, where are you?
I ain't got no money and I ain't got no boyfriend

Tell me how to grow into what you know
Skip past all the quiet months of shyness that I hold
Formalities be stashed
I've no use for that
Seems that age has snuck up to attack
It's the light that missed me
It's those man-sized titties
Someone should have told the kids the truth about what's pretty
You notice no eyes staring
Suddenly you're caring
And willing to take plunges if they were daring

Soon it's gonna come around
It's gonna sing the song you never wrote
It will astound

Boyfriend, boyfriend, where are you?
I ain't got no money and I ain't got no boyfriend
Boyfriend, boyfriend, where are you?
I ain't got no money and I ain't got no boyfriend

How much time must pass
How long I can last
What's the chance he's out there but you're crossing different paths?
Maybe I was blinking
My island's slowly sinking
I need a strong arm to do the rescuing
Now I will accost all the time lost
Grab it by the neck and make it cough up what I want
There's no getting back years of singles past
What would be the point in lamenting that

Soon it's gonna come around
It's gonna sing the song you never wrote
It will astound

Boyfriend, boyfriend, where are you?
I ain't got no money and I ain't got no boyfriend
Boyfriend, boyfriend, where are you?
I ain't got no money and I ain't got no boyfriend
I ain't got no money and I ain't got no boyfriend
I ain't got no money but I've got to get my boyfriend back


Aw Reg, I feel your pain.