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Of Montreal, "Beware Our Nubile Young Miscreants"
(2008)

You only like him because he's sexually appealing
But I read his journal, it was very revealing
He fucked your sister in an elevator junior year
Oh yeah, oh yeah
And let your brother suck him but then beat him
So he could prove he wasn't queer
Oh no
So what do you think he has in store for you, my dear?

You only like him because he's sexually appealing
But I've seen him work, and I am getting the feeling
He has some serious predatory domination issues
Oh yeah, oh yeah
He goes to climax alone
His heart beats a busy tone
Oh no, no
He's the kind of guy who would leave you in a k-hole
To go play Halo in the other room, remember?
While you were bereaving Michael's death
He was over at Rachel's cooking crystal meth
Oh, don't you remember?
Don't you remember

You only like him because he's sexually appealing
But his psychic's prediction has him hanging from a ceiling fan
In eight months

All our wizard dreams are still not impossible
All our wizard dreams are still so possible
All our tough little dreams, you know, they're still possible
And this goes directly to you

I don't know what it is that you want from me
But you, you cannot have it
If you could read my mind
Know what I really feel
I wonder, would we still be friends?


Thanks, Ellie!

Aside from some obvious homoeroticism, Kevin Barnes has been all about his genderfucked alter ego Georgie Fruit lately, so it's hard to say whether the "you" in the narrative is supposed to be a boy or a girl.